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Review: The Ugly Truth

April 9, 2012

Well, I suppose there’s no use in putting this off any longer. The Ugly Truth.

Katherine Heigl plays Abby Richter, the producer of a morning show in Sacremento, California. And you know what, before I even start I’d like to take a moment to remind everyone that this script was written by three women from a story written by one of them, and produced by Katherine Heigl and two of the screenplay writers. Just keep that in mind.

After a particularly disastrous cooking segment, Abby is called in by her boss. The morning show just isn’t getting the ratings they expect, and the network is considering dropping the show. But enough about her potentially being unemployed, we have to see her fail to find love through a combination of her date being a liar and her being controlling to the point where it gets a little creepy – not only did she do a background check, she brought it along with her! Oh, The Ugly Truth, I can tell you’re going to be a lighthearted comedy romp that won’t make me want to snap the disk over my knee.

She comes home after what can only be described the Hindenburg of dates where her cat turns on a show called “The Ugly Truth”, hosted by Mike Chadway, who is played by Gerard Butler. He’s a sexist asshole. No, I’m not joking. Mike Chadway suggests that the only things women need to get a man are a Stairmaster and fellatio.

Written by three women.

The next day, Abby shows up at work only to find that her boss has hired Mike on, based on the back-and-forth that they had the previous night. I’m going to speed through the rest of this, because I really want to be done with this review. To make a long story short, Abby takes Mike’s advice and ends up wooing the doctor she’d been going after, Mike learns that doctor Colin doesn’t like Abby for who she really is, she breaks up with him, and eventually gets together with Mike. Yes, the man who was introduced to us as a chauvinistic douchebag.

I’d like to list off why exactly this ending pisses me off.

  1. As it turns out, Mike isn’t a chauvinistic douchebag, he’s just hurt. Why? Why in the pus spewing blood-gutted HELL was this a plot point?! Just to point something out: not all dicks have been emotionally hurt, and the ones that have sure as shit can’t be fixed in a week. It would take years of therapy, and that’s if he isn’t being a dick for being a dick’s sake.
  2. If you’re going to pull the “kicked puppy” card, you have to play it a hell of a lot sooner than they did here. We’ve spent the majority of this movie hating Mike. You can’t just switch that kind of dislike off  with one scene. You might have had a chance after five minutes, but not after seventy-five.
  3. God bless Katherine Heigl in this movie. She is trying so hard to make a character that is pretty much every frat boy’s description of their controlling ex. I know I haven’t talked much about Abby, but Mike just pissed me off so much more.

In conclusion, I’m going to quote from the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy entry on love: “Avoid, if at all possible.”

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